Week 4: Can I stop End-Gaining?

Have you ever had the experience of working on something, but the harder you tried the worse it got? If you have, then this week’s topic will resonate with you. Here’s a quote from F M Alexander to begin:

…man’s craze is for speed and for the short view, because he has become possessed by the non-stop attitude and outlook: he is a confirmed end-gainer, without respect to the nature of the means whereby he attempts to gain his desired end.

F M Alexander, The Universal Constant in Living (1946)

So far in this course we’ve looked at the value of Inhibition, the Primary Control and Direction, and have made passing references to the habits that put us wrong. This week we’re going to delve a bit deeper into what Alexander identified as the most universal and harmful habit of them all: that of ‘end-gaining’.

You can think of end-gaining as an attitude where you’re obsessively focusing on a goal without working out how best to achieve it. Alexander’s remarkable discovery about end-gaining is that it always involves excessive physical tension. Since the mental obsession is always reflected in the body, it makes sense to talk of an ‘end-gaining attitude’ with all the physicality implied by that word.

On these lines, when I describe the concept to young people, I introduce the perfect literary example of an end-gainer: Gollum from J R R Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings. In the story, Gollum’s craving for the ring turns him into a permanently contracted being, forever diminished in size and character by the object of his obsession. It is interesting that people recoil in horror at this fictional creature, especially when I mention that we all have a little bit of Gollum inside us! This is confirmation to me that the end-gaining attitude is somehow beneath us – an affront to our dignity as human beings.

Alexander himself was fond of quoting Shakespeare’s lines:

What a piece of work is man, How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty, In form and moving how express and admirable, In action how like an Angel, In apprehension how like a god, The beauty of the world, The paragon of animals.

Shakespeare, Hamlet II: 2

In contrast, end-gaining interferes with our full potential as human beings – and here’s why.

Firstly, on a purely physical level, end-gaining creates undue muscular tension and so makes us more prone to discomfort, pain or injury. The end-gaining attitude also means we take up less space in the world: we become physically shorter, more narrowed and less balanced. We become diminished in stature – both literally and figuratively – and this creates a certain impression on those around us. It’s not how you’d like to be, for example, walking into a job interview.

Next, end-gaining ironically puts barriers in the way of even meeting our goals effectively. This is because in any activity that requires a level of dexterity (such as sports, music, dance or DIY), the most accurate fulfilment of a task requires the entire musculoskeletal system to be working well together – and it cannot do so if end-gaining has brought tension into any part of it. Neither are ‘cerebral’ or ‘abstract’ activities any less adversely affected. That’s because the habitual nature of end-gaining is like wearing blinkers. It interferes with your ability to choose an appropriate outcome and also the best route to that outcome. In other words, end-gaining takes away your choice and creativity.

Thirdly, on an emotional level, end-gaining generates feelings of frustration and anxiety because the result isn’t happening soon enough for us. It is thus an assault on our natural rhythms or pace. End-gaining is fundamentally a humourless disposition, and prevents you from being playful and flexible in your outlook. In the words of Diane Gaary,

Endgaining is an act of will in the face of fear that our needs won’t be met. In this fearful state, we are less aware, we don’t consider our options (the means whereby we could address our need), and in desperation we resort to muscular force.

Diane Gaary, Lighten Up!

Finally, in perhaps a more ineffable way, end-gaining diminishes us spiritually. If you are always goal-focused, the joy of being fully in your senses will be lost to you, and you will never value any activity for its own sake. In short, you will never be fully present in what you do. Whether you are religious or not, presence is something of real value – whether that’s in a work context (‘business presence’) or, for example, when giving your full attention to your children.

As can be seen, end-gaining involves a diminution of our self-awareness and self-potential on every level: physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually.

To stop end-gaining getting in our way, we therefore need to be watchful of the stimuli that trigger it. On the one hand, there are external triggers such as work load and time pressure at the office, or physically demanding activities such as going to the gym. On the other hand, many of the most pernicious triggers are actually internal, or self-created. Here’s a sample list of thoughts that can trigger end-gaining:

  • I’ve got to hurry
  • I need to be right
  • I’ve got to be good at this
  • I’m bad at this
  • This is difficult
  • I’m fed up and just want to get this over with
  • I just want to get this done
  • I’ll just get this done and then…

As you’ll know by now, the two best antidotes to harmful habits are Inhibition and Direction. Yet first we have to admit to ourselves that there’s even a problem. While end-gaining rules both the individual and collective psyche, this is indeed a challenge. But now that you’re aware of end-gaining as a phenomenon, you’ll be able to catch yourself in the act of end-gaining much more easily.

Over the next week, why not consider:

➣ Am I holding my breath or shallow breathing during this activity? This is a surefire sign that there’s a degree of end-gaining going on. Allowing a decent amount of oxygen to reach the brain has advantages you know!

➣ Ask yourself, ‘Can I do this activity for its own sake?’ rather than just trying to get it done. End-gaining is the enemy of doing anything for its own sake.

➣ The next time you feel frustrated with what you’re doing… Stop, breathe, and look around you. Scan your body for the tension you are no doubt holding. Bring your kind attention to that tension, Inhibit it, and then Direct your Primary Control. Take time, breathe and carry on, a different person to who you were before.